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Thursday, June 3, 2010

Sports Thursday Thread #3/The Fun Thread #3 For 6/3/10: The Top 20 Plus 1 Other Things You Should Focus On In The 2010 NBA Finals

Kobe Bryant's Annoying Overdone Scrowl
You all know the key stories lines? Can the Lakers beat the Celtics for only the 3rd time in 12 times in the Finals? Can the Celtics prove that with a healthy Kevin Garnett, they are still the best team in the league? Will Kobe make more people ask the absurd and flatout ridiculous question of "is he as good as .........Jordan"?

But instead of the usual coverage that you will find at NBA.com, ESPN.com, SI.com, and everywhere else, here is a much lighter and more random look into the upcoming 2010 NBA Finals. It's the "20 plus 1" things to look forward to during the finals.

5 Simple Observations you will make immediately

Pau Gasol's Wolfman "Badly Need A Haircut" Hairstyle. Goodness, from someone from Spain, he doesn't care about looking more "nappy" than suave. More so than even.......Paul Pierce!

You'll Still Yearn For the Days of the "NBA on NBC" music."

Mark Jackson has a disturbing obsession over constantly calling Ray Allen "Jesus Shuttlesworth" (We already know Mark), saying his catch phrase "MAMA, THERE GOES THAT MAN AGAIN" too much and making hip-hop/R&B references throughout the telecast that need not ever be made again by anyone else.

The continuing unnecessary mentioning of the anything Kardashian, especially Lamar Odom's now wife Khloe.

Watching ABC and saying "Damn, you still screwed up with the Lost finale!!" (And I didn't even watch that show.)


Five techincally irrelevant, really dumb, and arguably offensive questions:

Will Magic Johnson ever have a day where he won't pick the Lakers?

Who will out annoy the viewer the most: Mark Jackson or Stan van Gundy?

What's darker......the dim lethargic "turn off the lights" background of Staples Center or Kevin Garnett?

Do you think you Sasha Vujacic could take Kendrick Perkins in a fight? (of course that question is rhetorical. And if you need someone to point you out who specifically is Vujacic and who is Perkins, then you'll see.)

Seriously, admit it......will you keep thinking about Stuart Scott's lazy eye, just like every single year?


Top Over/Under Bets
The Amount of times you'll say "Damn, I miss Charles Barkley. Why couldn't TNT allow him to do the finals with ABC/ESPN?" (Over/Under 5)

The Amount of times you'll say "Damn, thank goodness we don't have Reggie Miller. Imagine how damaged my television would have been listening to him during the Finals (especially if you are a Knicks fan like me.) (Over/Under 5,000)

The Amount of times you'll curse whenever they remind you of how historic the "Celtics-Lakers" Rivalry is? (Over/Under 234)

The Amount of times one of your non-basketball fans asks the question: "Is Doc Rivers really a 'doctor' on the side?" (Over/Under 4.5, because they will ask it constantly and stop the 5th time they ask it in mid sentence)

The Amount of times you'll ask to yourself: Was Shannon Brown in the same awful dunk contest as Nate Robinson this past February in Dallas? (Over/Under: You already forgotten about that contest.)

The Amount of times you'll hear "Boston is a WAY better Sports town" than Los Angeles. (because it's true) (Over/under: Not enough times)

The Amount of times you'll here the word LeBron uttered (Over/under: Where Jamil Smith will frankly not give a damn until the Cavs being Cleveland the title they deserve).

The Amount of times you'll say "Man, Stephen A. Smith has somehow quietly left my life, THANK God!" (Over/Under: Just as many times as you'll say "THANK God!)

The Amount of you'll keep on saying "Rajon Rondo still looks like he is a good 10 years away from puberty."

The number of times Kobe/The Black Mamba/The Closer/Did people really name him "The Black Mamba??? gives his typical ridiculous and over-exaggerated scrowl (Over/Under: Sadly enough times)

And the only thing that Celtics/Lakers fans will agree on and laugh in full happiness with:
Because who will seriously want to buy that for their father right now?

And I say that as a ride or die Knick fan forever.

Your 20 plus 1 things to look for in the NBA Finals.
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